"Was that the Yank?" "Aye" "Oh bugger it, I wanted to say bye"
One of my favorite lines from a nice little movie Local Hero.
I have a habit of saying goodbye to my Nerinx students in this way: "You know that I am proud of you, you do, don't you?" If you have read a little bit of this blog, you may have read some of the stories of these students. They are wonderful young women, and I am so damn proud of every one of them. But I also want them to know just that, I intentionally want those words of pride to be the last words of our visit. I was leaving breakfast today and I was with John; Greg had walked a couple of steps away. I should have told them how proud of them I am. I have several rules for myself in these breakfasts, and I will have to make sure I add that one. John and Greg, I hope you know how proud I am of the men that you have become.
John is an English teacher in the Parkway district and has been a teacher for some time now. I have several distinct memories of John, (if I get the details wrong, who cares it is a good story). Priory had a freshmen football game versus the evil empire -- MICDS. Usually the evil empire would win those games. John played different positions but he was also a backup running back who did not carry the ball that much, if at all. It was a close game and I think we were down 10 points late. As we drove down the field, all of our starting running backs got hurt. John was summoned from the sideline by either Marty Combs or Jimmy Wortham. John got the ball and dove over the top for the touchdown. Five minutes later, he did the same thing and we rallied back to win the game. This also just happened to be the day of the Priory Grade School Math Contest. We needed a lot of help putting up chairs and cleaning up. Tasks that went so much easier with a whole bunch of freshmen around. I think every member of that freshmen football team was there helping out. They really did not want this day to end and they wanted to be there for each other.
The lesson that I try to teach, and I am not always successful in, is that hard work in practice leads to winning, or that hard work in math class makes you a better football player, or that spending a week on a service trip will make you a better student. All of these things in life go hand in hand. Hard work for others, even just putting away chairs after a math contest, lead you to be a better, kinder person. Hard work is the first act of selflessness. Kinship with another person, the forgotten person is the last act of selflessness..
So that football game was November of 1994? I think. I never forget John Duvall and that wonderful morning. A couple of years later I needed student volunteers to staff the Aim High program. I knew I wanted John Duvall. Sometime next week, maybe breakfast # 55 or so, I am having breakfast with Debbie Christanell, HKIA. I know she will remember John. I know that John remembers Debbie. There were two of our best volunteers, they did their best for each and every kid that took that long bus ride out to Priory every morning.
I have not seen John Duvall in a couple of years, and I have never seen him teach, but there is no doubt after this morning's breakfast that he is a great teacher. I saw his kindness and his compassion years ago, I watched him talk and listen to a kid that grew up on Page Avenue in the city. John just listened and laughed and was that friend that the kid needed. That day, I heard the "sound of the genuine" from John Duvall's soul, years later I hear that same kindness. I listened to this young teacher tell me exactly how I am going to change my classroom this year. I liked that he changed his classroom in a way I like to do it -- on the cheap with my own money.
I knew Greg since the 7th grade also. He has kind of a hockey player mentality in his DNA and I kind of remember just shoving him in the halls and he would immediately shove me back. I had to stop this in about the 9th grade, not because I grew up or acted like a real teacher, it was because he is a strong kid and he was just too strong. I was smart there.
I believe it was Senior year AP stats when I was telling the class, all boys, about being at another Cardinal playoff game or driving to a NCAA tournament game out of state. That lifestyle of hanging with your buddies, and spending all of your money on sports tickets must have seemed great. Greg just looked at me and said, "I want to hang out with you." I instantly replied, "You're a kid, I only hang out with 21 year olds." The next day Greg came in and said to me, "Mr. Magee 937 days until we are buddies and hanging out." And he kept that count up for some time. It was really a nice surprise, a few years later when I actually got a call on John Duvall's ?? 21st birthday and we shared a beer at OB Clarks.
I am the minority in St. Louis, not really a fan of Ozzie Smith. Somehow Greg found out about this and I tried to change his allegiance to Bob Gibson. Of course, when he was a little kid, Gibson had scowled at him when he wanted an autograph, so it was a tough sell. At his graduation party, I brought Greg an "autographed" baseball from "Bob Gibson" that also on the other side of the ball had the words, "I am much better than Ozzie." I look back fondly on that memory of messing with a student. Now Greg is a lawyer and was talking about some of his cases, very naturally, he mentioned that he sometimes takes a case without money. Of course he does! Greg was always kind of a goof and a kid that liked to rough house, he would play sports with one speed and often looked like he would hurt himself as much as the opponent. But he was also a great teammate and I remember him getting just as excited for the accomplishments of his teammates as he did for himself and of course as loud as anyone on the bench.
Late into our breakfast, Kate Sellenriek (Breakfast 28), made an appearance. I think it is another sign of how blessed I am. Kate and Greg have brought me joy. Just watching them makes me smile. How they burst onto any scene and into my life. If you can't tell. . . I kind of like the loud kids.
We went to the Soulard Garden Cafe because this place had history for John and Greg. John did not even need a menu, he knew what he wanted. There friendship was a joy to see. They often mentioned a name or just a couple of words and they knew exactly where they were in the conversation. It just makes me happy knowing that these two guys will have each others' backs for the rest of their lives.
All three of us agreed that we were on the right side of common sense in our world and politics. I think it is slightly easier to believe that when we are thinking of others or thinking about those without. John spoke very clearly and passionately about the students in his life who did not have the comforts and the love he had growing up. We talked about the challenges of these students and how, just maybe, we could help them. I am really focusing on hitting next year's students with as much energy and compassion as I can find, and mostly to be there for each student, listening to them. Listening to John, makes that task easier for me next year. His passion inspired me.
Here at this table in Soulard, I think we had that kinship for each other that Father Boyle talks about. I know that John and Greg will bring that kinship to their students and their clients and just live their lives as one of the best things they can be, good neighbors and good friends. Greg told me on how he is now on the board of LARCH, and we cycled back to that when I recruited them for our 5K in October.
Years ago, I was blessed to watch 2 young men grow up from 7th graders to Sixth Form adults. I had dreams and expectations for both of them. Now a generation later, they both have exceeded my expectations.
Damn right, I am proud of them. and I will tell them the next time I see them.
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