Breakfast 30 -- Kevin Ryan

            I have known Kevin since he was a seventh grader at Priory  or at least an 8th grader.  I just did the math and maybe it was as a 7th grader.  Middle school boys are middle school boys and we require them to figure out the whole world really quick and act a certain way,  when so much change is going on in their lives.  I am hoping with the hindsight of a couple of decades, that maybe now we listen to what they are telling us a little bit more.

           Kevin was and I imagine still a strong man (we did not arm wrestle at breakfast, but I am guessing).  When I first think of Kevin is practicing football with myself and Coach Combs.  I was learning football as I coached and I remembered when I ever I held a pad for Kevin,  that he was going to hit me with everything he had.  Coach Combs was teaching us both and told us that to be a good defensive end you had to push against their strength. I always remember this lesson from JV football.  The other team wants you to take the easy route and if you want to succeed you have to take the painful path and push against where they do not want you to go.  Strength against strength.

          It has been years since I have seen Kevin or talked to him at length.  Think about what I am doing,  I am having 90 minute,  2 hour conversations with other people and get to hear their thoughts and stories about their lives.  It costs me about $12 or $14 dollars oh and of course a good tip.  I am really serious when I reply to people I am eating with after they thank me for breakfast -- No Thank YOU!!  Think about for a really reasonable amount of money I get to hear the dreams and stories of people from my present, my past and I get to be just a little part of their lives.

         Kevin was and I assume is still,  a little bit, a man of strength and passion. So he did not take the easy path.  He pushed against where they did not want them to go as all good defensive ends do.  But I think because he took that path of odd jobs and different jobs he is now a stronger man for his wife and his three kids.  He is an IT man now and seems quite happy with his job.  I love the fact that he loves his job because he gets to solve problems.  Some where along the way I was his math teacher.  I am not going to say I was his coach, because I think we were both learning then.  But he LOVES to solve problems.  (A math teacher's dream)  Now as he continues his current work in IT and his continued work as a father and a husband,  he still has memories of his own path and the lessons he learned along the way.

         Kevin and I talked a little bit about why I am doing the 50 breakfasts.  I told him the story about Mike Radziewicz,  the story of a friend I lost touch with because Mike was too busy being a good husband and a good father.  Some 25 or 26 years ago I met a young boy named Kevin. 

         Father Boyle in discussing his work with gang members in Los Angeles says,  "We see in the homies what they do not see in themselves . . . until they do."  I hope the man I met today sees in himself what I saw in him so many years ago.